This is what it looks like for 1 hour. And you can't move.
I liked to keep my eye on the door -
bottom right corner.
Reason for MRI: dizziness & balance problems.
How long since an MRI was prescribed: 5 years ago.
Why such a long wait: a have a shunt in my ear that contains metal.
How we got around the metal issue: very tenacious family physician.
First try two months ago: too claustrophobic, lack of information on how much Xanax to take, tried 3 times & came out 3 times. Discouraging.
Second try yesterday: I.V. sedation scheduled, but the cardboard-tasting breakfast kept me from that option. Someone forgot to tell me not to eat anything ten hours before sedation. Full of anxiety, but determined to make this work, I went for option #2 - Vallium.
Inside the MRI: I prayed, "Please help me stay in here. Please, oh please, oh please. . . . " Classical music on headphones helped. Technician asking, "Are you okay?" helped. Carefully caressing the HELP button helped. Taking myself on a long, detailed tour of Santa Cruz helped. Naming, in order of age ( and again by category), my family, extended family, and close friends helped. Knowing Mr. B. was in the waiting room helped.
How long I stayed in the MRI: approximately 55 min.
Amount of time I should have stayed in the MRI: 65 min.
Luckily, I don't have to go back and make up those last 10 min.
Results: no indication of tumors or life-threatening illness, and no structural damage to brain or neck. Gloriously good news!
Prescribed plan of action: physical therapy for neck and balance problems.
Pickle: after many years of searching, I still don't know what I have, why it happens, or what causes it.
Gratitude: my body has learned various forms of compensation for dizziness, I have patient & understanding family and friends, I focus on what I CAN do, and there is always hope for a better and brighter future. I have learned to enjoy what I have now. We walked out of the hospital, and drove home. Back to our everyday lives.
Why blog about this: to remind myself that peachy pictures from the blogging world are only pieces of people's lives. Not the whole story. Because of dizziness, I often wrestle with anxiety and depression. I usually try to hide this about myself, because I hate to face reality, critical judgments, unwanted input, embarrassment, etc. But, today, instead of turning away from the part of me that is "flawed," I just feel glad to be me. All the pieces. The whole story.
FYI: view from MRI designed by me, using Illustrator CS4. Yea!
I love CS4.